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The student news site of Claremont High School

The Wolfpacket

The student news site of Claremont High School

The Wolfpacket

The student news site of Claremont High School

The Wolfpacket

Trump AI

Eshan Bhaskar, Reporter May 1, 2026

On Monday, April 13, 2026, President Donald Trump posted an AI-generated image of himself dressed in white robes, healing a man with magic glowing hands. A very medically sound image that Trump himself...

SATIRE: St. Donald’s Day

SATIRE: St. Donald’s Day

Violet Stewart-Glavin, Reporter March 6, 2026

In an attempt to win over the hearts of the American people and find funding for his so-called “master project,” Donald Trump has announced that he will be assembling a special task force to find...

SATIRE: My flipped food pyramid diet

SATIRE: My flipped food pyramid diet

Henry Phillips, Reporter March 6, 2026

On January 7, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. released the most revolutionary news since the invention of the car. The Department of Health turned the food pyramid… upside down. For all my life, I had considered...

A tuff solution to the housing crisis

Violet, Stewart-Glavin February 13, 2026

In an attempt to reach across the aisle to the conservatives in California, Governor Gavin Newsom has proposed purchasing half a million pre-built garden sheds from Home Depot to be installed in residential...

Trump X Maduro: a love story

Trump X Maduro: a love story

Pablo Guevara, Co-Head News Editor February 13, 2026

It has been over a month since U.S President Donald Trump ordered the capture of Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro. In that month, backlash against this decision to kidnap a foreign leader without warning...

SATIRE: They are dimming the sun

Tavish Brodie, Reporter November 7, 2025

The United States Federal Government does not control the weather. That duty is delegated to the Department of Weather Services (DOWS), located in the third basement of the Pentagon. Normally, DOWS does...

SATIRE: Trump rents Japan for World Series

Jonathan Imerman, Reporter November 7, 2025

With the Major League Baseball (MLB) World Series coming up between the Toronto Blue Jays and the Los Angeles Dodgers, United States President Donald Trump has decided to do the unthinkable and has rented...

How to be nonchalant at hoco

Andrew Luschei, Reporter October 18, 2025

Homecoming is a night of fun. At least, it is supposed to be. You will often catch people being trampled in the mosh pit, singing off tune to Bruno Mars, walking around aimlessly, or worst of all, exhibiting...

Image courtesy of United States Congress, edited by Henry Phillips

JD Vance blows White House budget on Robux

Henry Phillips, Reporter October 18, 2025

The White House reports on Saturday that President Trump’s MAGA-branded wallet was stolen by Vice President JD Vance. Sources confirm that Vance was complaining about not being given enough allowance...

SATIRE: Zero period zombie apocalypse

SATIRE: Zero period zombie apocalypse

Zarish Zaidi, Reporter May 2, 2025

An unsettling crisis is sweeping through Claremont High School, as students enrolled in zero period classes are reportedly transforming into full-blown zombies. The cause seems to be extreme and consistent...

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