After a successful review of all the Starbucks Holiday Drinks, I was asked by a friend of mine to go to the next level and do the same ranking system, except with on and off brand snack products. I, Lucas Grannis, reporter for the Wolfpacket, am the most qualified to judge these snacks. Hence I decided to go out and try them all! So here they are: all of the original and off brand popular snacks that you love to eat, ranked to which snack wins from each category. Each snack must be objectively measured, so I will be measuring winners based on three categories: Health, Taste, and Price.

Takis vs. Trader Joe’s Chili and Lime Takis

This debate has been going on for an incredible amount of time, and frankly has been the reason many friendships have been ruined. People need closure, and it is time this debate is finally settled. Rolled tortilla chips, fried, and dunked in a spicy tangy dust that is loaded with magical things of all different kinds of shapes and sizes. I bet you want to go buy a bag of Takis right now, don’t you? Well, before you do that, you should find out which brand to get. Let us observe all three categories and declare a winner.

Health: The Trader Joe’s Taki’s have more calories than the regular Takis but they have less saturated fat, sodium, and sugar, which overall deems them the healthier spicy snack. According to the nutrition label, the Trader Joe’s Takis are proven healthier and indisputably takes the win.

Taste: Taste has always been subjective. However, regular Takis are often not finished because of their spiciness. Meanwhile, Trader Joe’s Takis still maintain flavor, but also have the perfect amount of spice to be able to continuously eat these. Objectively speaking, Trader Joe’s wins on taste.

Price: $2.49. Trader Joe’s chili and lime-flavored tortilla chips compared with store bought $1.99 Takis shows that on brand Takis won this category.

Overall: There is no question about it. Trader Joe’s off brand Takis beat the original ones any day of the week. Winning in almost all categories, the landslide of a win speaks for itself.

Honey Nut Cheerios vs Trader Joe’s Honey Nut O’s

Nearly a quarter of Americans do not eat breakfast. This would change if more people found out about the delicious Honey Nut Cheerio cereal, which provides the perfect sweetness to start the day off. The question is: Which brand is better to buy?

Health: The calorie and sugar intake for both of these brands was almost identical. In the end, Trader Joe’s ended up having 110 calories per serving in their Honey Nut O’s, while the Honey Nut Cheerios won the health category with a total of 105 calories.

Taste: Again, this is subjective. However, these cereals did not taste only five calories apart. Trader Joe’s had a sweeter taste and had a delicate texture. Additionally, the cereal tasted less sweet, and roasted to a certain extent. It was clear Trader Joe’s off brand Honey Nut O’s won the taste category.

Price: The Trader Joe’s brand cereal for $2.29 was markedly cheaper than the Honey Nut Cheerios, which was $5.99.

Overall: Trader Joe’s off brand product wins in two of the three categories, taking the win once more.

Oreos vs. Trader Joe Joe’s Cookies

To all the chocolate lovers, this snack is for you. Based on who wins the majority of these three categories is where you should pick up your next bag of oreos.

Health: The healthier option was hard to distinguish between these two brands. The packaging for Trader Joe’s off brand products was identical to the regular. However, Trader Joe’s won this category by 10 calories, as their serving rate was 130 calories while regular Oreos have 140 calories per serving.

Taste: There was no question that on brand oreos won this category. They had an overall thicker base for the creme in the center. Meanwhile, Trader Joe’s chocolate base crumbled easier and was likely to fall apart. It was clear that the regular Oreo really was milk’s best friend.

Price: The tiebreaker. Drumroll, please. Trader Joe’s won the price category with $2.99 compared to Oreo’s original price of $5.99. However, due to technicality, even though Trader Joe’s won the majority of categories for the Oreo faceoff, the taste for the original Oreo’s was enough to outweigh the other factors. Hence, the original Oreos took the win.

Overall: Of the three most popular original and off brand snacks that were weighed, Trader Joe’s off brand snacks won the majority, meaning that the off brand snacks were overall superior. Be sure to pick up one of these snacks to help cope with life…trust me, it helps.