“Well, Mr. President, have the libs stopped screaming?”
On December 20, 2024, just a month shy from inauguration, President-elect Donald Trump announced another controversial choice for his cabinet. The once-believed fictional character and cannibal, Hannibal Lecter, has now stepped into the political limelight as the new head of the Food and Drug Administration.
It seems this reveal was a long time coming, foreshadowed through Trump’s not-so-subtle admiration of Lecter, back when it was just thought to be a running joke. In his acceptance speech to the Republican National Convention in July, he mentioned the “late, great, Hannibal Lecter” saying “he’d love to have you for dinner.” The former-now-president-elect made references to the cannibal serial killer from Silence of the Lambs over 11 times before the nomination, spread out between rallies, conventions, and other public appearances throughout his time on the campaign trail. What may have once been a fanatical obsession–or perhaps another love affair–now proves to be calculated political pandering.
But there is no joking now. No, now the libs have started screaming, and they will not be stopped. The irony of nominating perhaps the most infamous cannibal of our time to be in control of the nation’s food supply is in no way lost on the left, and their outrage partnered with the incredulity of the situation is only fanning the flames of political unrest surrounding Trump’s cabinet picks. In particular, PETA CEO Ingrid Newkirk has been particularly vocal.
“Humans are animals too,” Newkirk said in a press release. “Doesn’t mean I support killing them, Mr. Lecter.”
And yet the nominee has remained surprisingly stoic. In a tweet last Friday, he denounced his haters–by quoting his movie.
“God has given to man no sharper spur to victory than contempt of death,” Lecter wrote. “I will either find a way or make one.”
Shortly after this dramatic response, Lecter released a list of things he would like changed and added as head of the FDA.
“That mystery meat they put in kids’ lunches?” Lecter wrote. “We’ll be putting that under review. Maybe we’ll change the recipes while we’re at it. Think of all the advances in fashion we’ll have when suits and dresses made from human skin are FDA approved. You’d surely look good in one of those, Clarice.”
The public is still unsure who this ‘Clarice’ is, but psychologists assume it is a character Lecter created in his mind as a side effect of his psychoticism. And if Lecter is true to his word and starts legalizing human-skin fashion, perhaps the term “suit yourself” will take on a literal meaning.
But unlike many political activists, students at CHS do not seem too worried by Lecter’s
policies. Junior Jami Rahman in particular seems to be quite enthusiastic about the change.
“That’s crazy,” Rahman said. “But the mystery meat they serve at lunch has always tasted a little funny. If it takes a cannibal to improve our school lunches by tweaking the stuff inside, I don’t mind. At least it won’t give me indigestion.”
Fear is the price of imagination when it comes to imagining what Hannibal Lecter’s vision for 2025 and onward will impact our day to day lives. With promises of disaster for those who oppose his new rule, coupled with an insatiable hunger (for power), there’s no telling what the future will bring.
And thus begins the Silence of the Libs.
