The stream has been going on for years, each and every day The Lofi Girl is streaming. Despite the countless hours, the numerous subjects studied, the material memorized, enough is enough. Since 2017, The Lofi Girl has been helping students study, any hour of the day with non-stop 24 hour live streams. Always being there for students along with providing soft hip-hop background music, day and night. However, The Lofi Girl has studied for the final time, and society is crumbling. Without hip-hop beats playing against an animated background essentially creating an aesthetically calm study space, students have lost any and all ability to focus while studying. And the consequences are quickly becoming detrimental.
Students are beginning to drop out of school as none of the material can be understood without The Lofi Girl studying right beside them. Parents are panicking as their children no longer have the ability to pursue colleges, or apply for jobs. Teachers for a first have even stopped assigning homework, as their students simply no longer have the capability to complete it. From all over the globe, students are attempting to process this news during this difficult time; but cannot focus due to lack of lofi beats, so all remain confused at the situation, resulting in the president declaring a national emergency. There have been numerous attempts to mimic what The Lofi Girl once was; however, all efforts have been proven pointless as nothing can ever compare to the original. All military forces were immediately informed and understood the gravity of the situation, however, even then all attempts to track and locate The Lofi girl have failed.
So what now? As of September 2024, the president addressed the nation.
“We as a nation have tried anything and everything to help our students learn as they once did; however, only so much can be done.” The president said. “The population which has been the most affected from this tragedy, unfortunately will require to be taken care of by those of us who are not affected. Until of course, natural selection eventually cleans up this mess.”
Regrettably the conclusion is clear. Society has had a long run, but all things must come to an end. However, amidst the chaos, one answer still remains unclear, The Lofi Girl may be the last one standing. But will she return? And if she does, will it be too late?
SATIRE: The Lofi Girl Stops Studying, and So Does Society: A Global Crisis Unfolds
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Makayla Aguilera, Reporter
Makayla Aguilera currently is a senior at CHS, and a first year reporter within the Wolfpacket. Makayla holds great love for her variety of passions ranging from, thrifting and arts, to sustainability and feminism. When Makayla isn’t advocating for the environment she can usually be found crafting at her desk with an iced mocha right beside her, or even sometimes hiking with her friends in the great outdoors. Makayla is looking forward to her first and last year on the Wolfpacket and is overall excited for what her senior year has to come.